Welcome to a
new way of being.
Are you being selfish? I certainly hope so! If your not then you may be in PAIN
Do you recognise that old familiar feeling? what is it, sadness, frustration, overwhelm?
The truth is we feel emotional pain for a good reason.
P.A.I.N is an acronym for Please Acknowledge Information Now. Our bodies are in constant communication with us and yet we are not taught to read these signals, we usually just try to get away from them, some of us stuff them down, believe me, that takes a lot of energy that could be put to better use. Some of us act out and leave a trail of devastation along the way. We do all this for one reason, RELIEF! every action we take is because we BELIEVE it will make us feel better….
This has been my journey, to understand the realms of emotions and the vital role they play in our lives. Is there such a thing as inner peace? can you create it at will?
How can anyone remain calm with what is going on around them? Sure if you could sit on a mountaintop and chant, that may work for a while until you step back into the “real” world. Same stresses, worries and challenges and all the while losing the energy battle to keep up the facade that all is well.
Maybe you feel guilty for wanting more? Surely that is selfish. No, it isn’t! That is how we grow. Anything with life is either growing or dying. To desire is to live, to grow, to evolve its what were designed to do
As already mentioned what we really want is to feel good.Sadly unless we have awareness in the moment and the strategies to “do” something different we will repeat the same old ways we are conditioned with. Can you imagine having a choice in how you feel, regardless of what is going on around…
You can’t control others and some circumstances but you can control how they affect you. Imagine being more content so that you can enjoy what you already have got. More calm so that you don’t burst a blood vessel. Imagine feeling safe so that you can explore and be adventurous, taking gutsy action, the right action! And all with a big dose of self-compassion and understanding. This is all within your reach. You will be pleased to know you already have the tools and the technology. The challenge up to now is that we often are using the wrong tools for the wrong job. I know I have. For over two decades I have been seeking and searching delving into many schools of thought around personal development. I’ve even walked on hot coals; yep mind over matter.
All this searching started for me when I became a mother, terrified of “getting it wrong” I enrolled in parenting classes. I soon realised the power of the labels we use on ourselves and others. Like any parent, I wanted for my children above all else to grow up happy. This led me to study counselling but I really felt you don’t heal a scab by picking it, it didn’t sit right with me so I turned my focus to life coaching because that’s about looking towards what you DO want. Then came the tools NLP, EFT Matrix Reimprinting, Bach remedies etc etc you get the picture the list goes on.
They say “when the student is ready the teacher will appear” I find that to be true, hindsight is a wonderful thing, don’t you think? So there I was in my local Sainsburys waiting to be served when a bookcase displaying secondhand books the scouts were selling caught my attention. One book was calling me, I read the blurb and risked the humongous 50 pence charge. I devoured that book in one sitting and found myself in those pages, it really was an OH SHIT moment, the me that I didn’t know existed was outed. What was fascinating to realise is that what I had always deemed my “positive traits” were, in fact, my gift and my challenge!! And so the focus changed from wanting to be a great parent to wanting to be a great me not least because through this awareness I could be the best parent “I” could be. I recognised how much influence my parents had had on me and where I had turned away from my truth. I found an understanding of why my brother and I have very different perceptions of our parents and the world at large even though we are from the same gene pool and lived in the same environment. Make no mistake the Enneagram is profound but it is the map of how you are “doing” yourself now, habitually. How do you improve?
Enter TRE (tension and trauma relieving exercises) this came into my world at a really low point. My challenging father was dying and I was working with a hostile boss. I learned how my body was holding the patterns of my history which is so obvious when you think of the way EFT and NLP work!. I slowly started to release the years of tensions and still to this day enjoy “letting go” I love that there is no dialogue with this method no story to regurgitate. But wait for it there’s more!! mBIT (multiple brain integration techniques) found me and the loop was closed. This science-based evidence backs up what the ancient wisdom of the Enneagram has shown for over 2500 years. We have 3 centres of intelligence(brains) this is the manual for your internal world!!! please read that line again